confusing..afraid..depressed

Assalamualaikum dears,

Dah lama I x update belog ni.. Banyak story nk diceritakan tp x berdaya nk tulis.

WHY?

Because I am afraid of myself..

I'm afraid I'm not strong enough to write and at the same time, my feeling won't be wavered!

I won't cry.

I won't remember the bad memories.

I hoped that was only my bad dream.

I hoped it'll disappear!

I am so confused with myself right now. It's been two weeks. I hope for a miracle, but it didn't come.

Now, I am depressed! Lebih-lebih lagi bila dah realize I should back to college soon. What will I do with this confused feeling??

I hope by the time I reached there, my questions will be answered. I'm tired of this troubled feeling~